I lit a cigarette. There was music behind me. It was twenty degrees below zero, but I didn’t feel it. Vodka was buzzing in my veins. I loved January and her freezing aura. Carnival and shameless women who enjoy easy sex without the obligation of the mouth. There is no more exciting season than winter, and I don’t plan to ski on the snow-covered slopes or lie down in front of the fireplace. In a hotel in Zakopane. I mean the city that smells of exhaust gas and frost. annoying, and at the same time a breathtaking view of a lonely street sunk in dirty snow.
It was four thirty. I did not want to return to the bar. I called to finish the night at my company. I liked to drink. I can’t stand it lately. I knew that a house mirror could withstand the gaze of strangers. They turned away in hatred.
In addition to the iPhone pocket, I looked at the number of the taxi company. At that moment, I felt that someone hugged my back.
– Are you leaving me? After all, it was very beautiful … – whispered the girl I bought a few drinks for half an hour ago.
– On average. And yes, I leave you alone.
It was average and I only appreciated the most beautiful things.
“Asshole,” he sobbed and stepped back.
I chose the number of the Corporation without fear. The consultant told me that I had to wait twenty minutes for a taxi. I sighed. There is nothing to be upset about. Vodka will wait. He is patient.
I offered him a night
All the windows of the house next door were black. Probably ordinary people lived there. They lived a quiet life with a full refrigerator and a sober Monday. I’m not …
I looked at the door leading to the building: a woman was standing in front of them. He wore only a black shirt and orange shoes up to half of his hips. I shuddered as I felt the cold wind blowing on my cheeks.
– Do you need help? I asked as I approached him.
She was beautiful, though not very delicate. Her hair was ripe burgundy, and cheap earrings hung from her ears. This subversive grace did not hurt the black eye. I thought that the dress was not the biggest problem for this girl.
“I don’t need it,” he sobbed.
I did not believe. I took off my jacket and handed it to a stranger. The cold cut my breath. I will wake up at the speed of light.
– A taxi will take me for ten minutes. I can offer you accommodation or take you to the ambulance or the police.
She accepted the dress without saying a word. I watched him hug around … This scene made a strange impression on me; I swallowed hard. Will the jacket smell like that girl?
– Where you live? Suddenly he asked.
– In the city center.
– What is my guarantee that you are not a serial killer?
– No, but when a taxi arrives, I warn you to take my jacket. It is expensive and I am attached to my belongings.
He looked into my eyes. He was judging me.
“I hope your apartment is warm,” he admitted after a while and walked over to the oncoming car.
I looked at his dark, long legs: gas shoots covered his brown skin.
The taxi driver did not comment on my husband’s appearance. When parking in front of a residential building, a surprise shone on the girl’s face. When we went upstairs by car, I watched his reflection in the elevator mirror. A beautiful one. This is not like corporate distress. I first let him into the apartment. He stood in the middle of the room and looked at the painting that Beksinsky had hung there. He showed a blue head bleeding from his nests.
– Self-portrait? He asked.
I liked his sense of humor.
“Yes,” I smiled. – Maybe I’ll make you some tea? Or something stronger?
– Tea is enough for me. I do not drink alcohol.
Let it be. I’d like a drink.
He understood what I offered him
We went to the kitchen together. I was hoping to impress him with the apartment design; I put a lot of money in it. I gave him a hot drink and made myself a juicy vodka. He silently watched me swallow alcohol with my hungry sip. What comfort. I finally felt blood dripping from my thirsty stomach. Vodka like ragweed – gave me immortality.
– What happened to you? – I asked.
– I had a little argument with the boy.
– If you look like this after a small argument, then you are hospitalized after an argument?
He didn’t say anything, just slowly mixed the tea with a silver spoon. The girl’s nails were covered with iridescent varnish. Terribly tasteless, but I couldn’t take my eyes off her delicate hands. The movement of the wrists was surprisingly gentle.
– Stay as long as you want. I will help you …
He understood what I offered him.
– Do you like to collect expensive and beautiful things?
– You could say …
– Do you also gather people?
I got up to make another drink for myself.
I said, “You can’t gather people,” though.
– What am I doing here? He asked.
I turned to him. His chin was challenging and rising. He hired me.
– I saved you from freezing I reminded him.
He got up and went to the high kitchen window. Dawn broke between the gray, dormant skyscrapers. His bruises deepened in the morning light.
– My mother always said that I attracted the wrong boys. All bastards or losers.
“I’m not mean, let the loser stay,” I laughed.
It was clear. Hugo Boss suits hung in my closet, and in my garage was the richest version of the infinity crossover.
– Yes. You are very bad he admitted.
– Listening? I raised my eyebrows and asked.
She looked into my eyes. Only now did I realize that they have a very clever expression.
– My current boy will sometimes punch me because he is out of control. He shouldn’t do that, and I shouldn’t go with him, but you … you’re worse.
I clenched my jaw with all my might. What was he saying ?! How dare he talk to me like that ?! After all, I helped him!
– My son hurt my body, but you … hurt me more. The only thing you can do is drink and make money. You turn everything else into nothing. Because you don’t have your own life, you ruin people’s lives. That’s why you drink a lot.
– Why are you here? To insult me? Are you jealous that I have money? If it weren’t for me, you would probably be frozen on this street!
My screams had no effect on him. I watched him walk toward the front door, and a strange fear filled me.
– Sorry. Stay, I whispered.
I was amazed at how pathetic and pleading my voice sounded.
“But you don’t need me,” he replied. He was standing behind me. -Nobody needs you. You don’t even care about yourself.
He closed the door behind him and left.
I began to breathe. I was shocked by the horror of not being able to explain that my life was a big lie. I was afraid to be nobody, a The only thing I can do is take it without giving it back. “Because I had nothing. I looked around the empty apartment in horror, looking for help, looking for a proof that I was wrong. I wanted to see something that would give me hope that I was not bastard or defeated.
“Instead of trusting me, my husband believed in the nonsense of my past. This madman convinced him that he was not our son’s biological father. “
“Radek first hit me with a car and then became my husband. If I don’t feel sorry for the rest of my life, I’ll think about it. “
“My daughter took my boyfriend and married him. I cried during the whole ceremony, I imagined that I was in his place “