“It’s impossible to live since my mother discovered the Internet. Sometimes he sends memes and videos and calls me a minute later, why don’t I answer “- Real life

image: Adobe Stock, nataliaderiabina


The broth was boiling, the potatoes in the oven were burning, Nela was screaming in the playground, and Mateus was shouting from the bathroom, “Mom, I did it.” I didn’t know what to put my hands on, and my phone rang angrily. I ignored him. Finally, as I stepped out from under the stack of laundry and housework, I looked at the screen and saw my mother’s eleven messages and many missed calls. I checked my messages first. Film with a dog and two funny cats; a beaver eating lettuce for three minutes; Failure in some dance competitions is not funny. And a few memes, ie funny captioned pictures. And then the born “Why don’t you take it?” as more messages come.

– Mom, what’s going on? – I changed Nela’s porridge soiled and threw it to the receiver.
– Well, I’m writing to you and nothing! Why are not you answering
“Why, mother?” Nela was twisting and it was difficult for me to pick her with one hand. – You sent me funny videos and photos.
– And you didn’t even comment on them! he said eagerly. – I wanted to make you laugh, I know your hard times.

I sighed. A month ago, my mother didn’t know what Facebook was, and the only thing she knew about the Internet was that “young people are still inside.” He was bored after retirement, his father was still working and came home in the evenings, not knowing what to do with the sudden increase in his free time. So I showed him how to control the computer and the Internet on a mobile phone. I created a Facebook account for him to search for old friendsI showed sites worth going to, and when I joined several Facebook groups, I was satisfied with it.

He began to exchange information on ecological methods of care and cultivation of orchids in the meadow, met many people with practically similar interests. Everything sounded great until he started finding dozens of funny messages a day.

– Well, it’s funny! – defended a collection of videos about awkward children. Or: – I found songs from my youth! Everything is here! Listen to this! And: – Have you seen yet? It’s about product circles and it really makes you think!

I tried to tell him softly that I had a job during the day, And in the evening, when I can put my children on the floor, I just want to lie with my husband in front of the TV or in bed, not to read the news all day. Only my mother did not understand this and continued to spam me with videos and memes.

– What does “spam” mean? He asked when I told him that. “It means sending messages to someone you don’t want.” Companies even push their products and services, but spam also means blaming someone in an email. Please don’t do this … If I want to look at something funny, I’ll find it myself.



My mother was upset for a whole week

It was a wonderful seven days without the occasional ringing of the phone and no complaints of not answering. But then my mother discovered the news pages and started sending me “news of the day” to keep up with what was happening in the country and in the world. At the same time, he did not give up his favorite cats, beavers and frogs. I was surprised when I received a message not from my mother, but from my older sister Jolka, who had lived in Belgium for years.

“Mother called,” he said, and I prepared to make an excuse that I was a bad girl.
“My mother invented the Internet,” I sighed. – Sends you memes and videos?

was a stupid question. Jolka was a nurse who assisted during the operation. Everyone in the family knew that if the world did not burn and no one died, he would not be disturbed. I envied his assertion. Although I did not give the surgeon a scalpel, I had two small children, the whole house was on top of me, and I was still trying to study for a driving test. And no one felt that my time should be respected. There were times when lonely friends would call me because they were tired of waiting for a massage, or my mother-in-law would ask me for color advice under the pretext of just buying a carpet, and then she would call me and call me. half an hour So I complained to Jolce to let her know how difficult it was for me.

– Or are you not ambitious enough? He asked without criticizing in his voice. – You also have a very responsible job, you are a mother and you have the right not to have time to talk. Do you know that you can turn off your phone? Now there was a small mockery in his voice.
– If Wojtek can call from work with something important, how can I turn it off?

Then my sister gave me something I had never thought of before.

– Get yourself a landline phone. You spend a lot of time at home, don’t you? And give the number only to the selected people. If someone has a really important job, he will call home.

It was a pretty outdated solution, but why not? Today, everyone is so used to mobile phones that almost no one has an old phone. I did it in twenty-four hours. Then it was enough to inform my mother and friends that … I am going to rehabilitation.

“I spend a lot of time on the phone,” I said. – I have to detox myself. I will burn it for a few minutes several times a day.


Of course, I gave my mother a new house number, and so did my mother-in-law. The husband wrote it as “home” and sometimes called. My friends, who liked to talk a lot when they had time, didn’t get this number, despite my restrictions, but I promised them coffee. When I have the time and opportunity. My detox has been going on for three months and I’m very happy with it. My mother started sharing funny videos and photos with Jolka’s stepdaughter, the most suitable person in the world. As far as I know, my grandson is ahead of him in sending internet messages, and both agree.

However, I have a little secret. In fact, after two weeks of rehabilitation on the phone, I stopped turning it off. He lay on the closet to check the air or listen to my favorite music. But I did not disclose it to anyone. Because the phone is for me, I am not for the phone. And I hope my kids learn it!

Also read:
My parents prefer a bottle more than my grandson. They don’t like my Pauline
My mother did everything for me. I couldn’t even set the laundry
I knew that the fruit of my betrayal was alive somewhere, but I did not think it would knock on my door.


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